Molly Mclaren
May 26, 1994-June 29, 2017
Molly McLaren Foundation
12 days after breaking up with her boyfriend of 4 months, 23-year-old Molly Mclaren was stabbed 75 in broad daylight with people all around, in the parking lot of her gym.
Some of you on this channel know that a senior criminology lecturer, Dr. Jane Monkton Smith, identified 8 steps or stages that typically occur in a domestic violence homicide.
This case had sufficient information that allowed me to identify some of these points, so as I recognize them in this story, I will point them out.
Molly was an incredibly strong, kind, funny, and caring person. If she decided to do something, she put 100% of herself into it. Molly struggled with an eating disorder but faced it head-on and did her best to try and understand it and find strategies that allowed her to overcome them. She put her focus on living healthy, developed a passion for exercise, maintaining a positive attitude and holistic well-being, and decided to share her journey and experience on social media in hopes of inspiring people to overcome their own challenges. When she started college, she was quick to make friends. They say that no matter what they were doing, they were having fun if they were with Molly. If they were ever down, she'd tell them, "FIND 1 GOOD THING ABOUT EVERYDAY AND YOUR MINDSET WITH SHIFT."
In July 2016, Molly matched with a guy on tinder. They talked briefly and met in person in October or November of that year. To her and all her friends, he seems like perfect boyfriend material. The two hung out a few times, and then they started dating. (If we think about the 8 steps of domestic homicide, the fact this relationship developed slowly was quite unusual). It was her first serious relationship. They seemed to connect over their shared love of exercise and their personal challenges, as he had anxiety and suffered from depression. Her friends were happy she had found someone. It seemed like they could lean on each other during their dark days, and the other would help them see the light. (stage 2-the relationship appears to have developed at an average rate.)
What Molly and her friends didn't know was that this guy had a scary history. After an ex broke up with him, he followed her, took pictures of her, (and threatened) to slash(ed) her tires and drown her. Another time a woman broke up with him, and he proceeded to spit his drink out all over her, then creepily sat outside for hours, waiting for her to leave. This is the first stage of dv homicide in this case. (STAGE 1)
Things started well, but he became increasingly manipulative, controlling, nasty, and clingy after a few months. He wanted to be with her every second of every day. She thought his behavior was childish, and she would tell her friends she felt like she was walking on eggshells around him.
By March, just 4 months into the relationship, things soured. She told him they couldn't be together 24/7, and she was feeling pressured and controlled. He didn't want her to spend time with anyone unless he was there, and he did things like show up unannounced at her house. It became clear to everyone that he wanted to isolate her from her family and friends. Molly decided she wanted to take a break from the relationship.
He bombarded her with messages begging her to take him back, and after a few weeks, she did. Her friends felt like he guilted her into it. It's no surprise things didn't change. He didn't want her to have any time alone with her friends. He'd invite himself if she went out with friends or made plans. By this point, coercive control was dominating the relationship. This reflects stage 3 of dv homicides. (STAGE 3)
Molly tried one last thing in May to see if she could "fix" the relationship and make it work. Maybe a little time alone together would patch things up. That goes to show you how much he manipulated her, for her to think she had to try and "fix" it when she didn't do anything wrong. They took a trip, and it didn't go well. She texted her friends not long into the holiday, saying, "I thought this stuff with (him) was going to pass, but it's not." Her mind was made up. When they got home, she would end the relationship.
On Saturday, June 17, Molly and her friends went out, and despite arguing and being on rough terms, she invited her bf to join them. At some point, Molly and her bf started arguing, and she just sort of snapped. She pulled him aside and broke it off. He got aggressive and upset and screamed, "she's finished with me," before storming out.
On June 19, he started posting nasty things about her on FB, claiming she was using cocaine just days before their break up and that "there was more to come."
He bombarded her with messages begging to get back together. And she started to get scared he would show up at her house.
She blocked him on social media, but he got a friend to keep tabs on Molly through social media and keep him informed as to what she was posting. She blocked him and reported the harassment to FB, but nothing was done. Investigators would later say that he was trying to publically humiliate her.
On June 20, Molly applied for a job at Nuffield gym in Kent.
He doesn't stop harassing her, and on June 21, Molly tells a friend she's scared her ex might hurt her.
By June 22, Molly and her mother go to the police station to report the FB posts. Officers decide the best course of action is to call him and ask him to stop posting about her, or he will be prosecuted. Later that day, Molly and her mom shared his picture with their neighbors and asked that they call them if he was ever in the area. Either this moment or the initial breakup may contribute to stage 4, when there is a threat to the perpetrator's control. (STAGE 4)
The 27th stage 7 occurred. It was busy for Molly's ex. He left work early that day and joined the gym Molly applied to work at. Later that day, there is CCTV footage of him going into a store and purchasing a paring knife. Roughly 24 minutes later, he buys a pickaxe from a different store.
Later that day, the PD calls Molly to tell her that her ex agreed to take down the posts about her. This demonstrates step 6 of the 8 steps of domestic violence, where the perpetrator has a change of thinking.
On June 28, one of Molly's friends (got a job?) and Molly successfully enrolled in a personal training course, so she and her friends decided to go out and celebrate. She posted a selfie on FB and wrote about her plans that night. While out with her friends, her ex shows up with another woman at the bar. Throughout the night, they catch him staring at Molly from across the bar, and when he leaves, he walks right by their table even though he doesn't have to. Her friends were horrified that she had to see him with another woman, but she told them she wasn't jealous and confirmed that she had made the right choice to break up with him.
Shortly after, Milly decided to head home. Her friends stayed at the bar. They later recounted how no one realized the severity of the situation. When Molly left that night, no one even thought to walk her out to her car that night or anything. But they shouldn't carry any blame; how could they possibly know what he was capable of.
On Thursday 29th wanted to record another video for her workout blog, so she went to the gym. It was quiet, and she found an empty studio to work out in. There was a camera in the gym that recorded the following events.
About 20 minutes later, obviously stalking Molly, he shows up at the gym. There's footage of him approaching the studio where Molly is working out. He walks up the stairs, stops, then walks back down the stairs, seemingly abandoning his plans. But he doesn't; after just a few steps, he turns around, leaps up the steps, and enters the studio. He grabs a yoga mat, sits beside her, and starts working out.
She was freaked out and texted her mom and one of her friends. They are both concerned. After a few moments, Molly gets up the courage to go and confront him. She asked him, "why he wasn't at work" and "if he was following her," he said it wasn't her business.
After about 30 minutes, he leaves the gym. Molly calls her mom and messages her friend, and they both advise her to leave the gym and head straight home. What they couldn't possibly know was that her ex hadn't left. He had gotten into his car and was driving around the parking lot of the shopping center, waiting for her to come out to her car. After a few minutes, she packs up her stuff and heads to her car. As she's walking through the parking lot, she's texting one of her friends, saying things like, "I feel like I'm f*&^%ing looking over my shoulder all the time." Her friend replied, "Don't worry about him. He's a psycho." The message was read, but Molly never replied.
He had spotted her and drove his car to the adjacent aisle from where she was parked. As she entered her driver's seat, he ran to the car, yanked the door open, and started attacking her.
Just moments later, witnesses called 999, the emergency line reporting a man attacking a woman in her car. A witness saw Molly's ex attacking her and bravely tried to pull him off her, but there was so much blood the man couldn't get a firm enough grip on him to get him off her. During his frenzied attack, he stabbed her in the chest and neck and cut entirely through her neck. The man that tried pulling him off her said, "he was continuously stabbing the female in the neck and head, but mostly the neck. He was doing it repeatedly" Within seconds, she lost consciousness, and despite receiving prompt medical attention, nothing could be done to save her. The attack started around 11:08, and she was pronounced dead by 11:43am.
He didn't try and run, but he stayed on the scene, and when police arrived, they found him covered in blood and arrested him on sight.
Her death has had a tremendous impact on her friends and family. They are devastated.
Upon reflection, it's highly likely that the night before Molly's murder, when she was out with her friends and her ex showed up, he had intentions and thoughts about harming her.
On February 6, the jury took less than 3 hours to find Molly's ex guilty. He was sentenced to life in prison. The judge said, "this was a cruel and cowardly act. This was an act of wickedness. You took away Molly's life quite deliberately in the most vicious fashion. He went on to call Molly's ex a wicked and cowardly person. Let's not even remember him; he doesn't deserve to be named or remembered.
As of 2022, 2 women a week are murdered by their partners or ex-partners in the UK; stalking is identified in 94% of these cases.
Molly will be remembered as an outgoing, lively joker with a big bright smile. For having struggles but never letting them win, she was a caring person who wanted to advocate and share her story to empower and inspire others. Her family and friends went on to set up, The Molly Mclaren foundation to help people with eating disorders by distributing money and raising awareness. Every year on Molly's birthday, they hold, Mollyfest to celebrate her life and raise funds for charity.
I want to send my condolences to Molly's friends and family. She seemed like such an incredible person and friend. I'm genuinely sorry for your loss.
Molly McLaren Foundation
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